Art for Naught

An article by Hugo Blue

GAINSVILLE—When Italian artist Salvatore Garau unveiled his invisible sculpture, Io Sono (I am) in June — made of air and spirit — it divided people sharply along imaginary lines. None more so than Tom Miller who claims the idea was his originally.

Miller, a performance artist by trade, fashioned his own Nothing by hiring a pretend workforce to mime moving blocks of air into a kind of Egyptian Step Pyramid.

Imhotep says he came up with it first.

“I should be credited with Nothing,” says Miller, which is at least a turn from the usual megalomaniacal fare.

Garau’s work, by contrast, was auctioned to an equally unseen buyer for $22,000. It’s a vacuum, he says, and therefore particles. And we are particles— Heisenberg even said so.

In a documentary, Garau explains, “It is a work that asks you to activate the power of your imagination.” It’s also a science textbook.

For clarity, Garau asks: “Don’t we shape a God we’ve never seen?” I don’t know. I thought I saw Him in a tortilla chip once, but maybe don’t ask me.

Dozens of other immaterial artists have also come forward with their null works. If only we could tell them apart.

Too bad they’re all wrong. I’m the real Spartacus who came up with this ingenuity. See my sculpture, Zephyr Licking a Quantum Rose, on display in Edville’s town square — a place that really appreciates such work.

And you thought NFTs were bad.

Editor’s Note: An article from The Edville Gazette appears on News Now Network sites once a week. There is also a podcast for your listening delight https://anchor.fm/radiofreeedville.

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